the Green drink frenzy

I follow several blogs and have quite a few friends who are foodies and I have to say I'm quite perplexed by the Greens Phenomenon that seems to be overtake the blog-o-sphere. When I was dating the last boyfriend, he drank greens on a daily basis. But he was, and is for all I know, searching for the fountain of youth. I tried it once, or three times. And wanted to immediately projectile vomit whatever hadn't been digested yet.

Oh.my.god. That stuff is wicked gross. So, I don't know why or how others get it down. I mean, I suppose, I know why, it's got lots of great stuff in it. Call me crazy, I'd rather cook and eat my greens than drink them with milk et al.

This is my personal opinion and in no way reflects that of current management.

I've disappeared for a week

I've been out the last week and haven't written but not because there hasn't been stuff to tell, but rather because I've been so busy that I've not wanted to rattle off some half-assed post.

Last weekend was my book splurge weekend. I found lots and lots of book on sale at the various library sales and my used book store.

So, when Shyanne wanted to go to the pool, I grabbed a book and went. Wow, I hadn't realized how it is has been during the day since I'm inside the majority of the day. Being outside really wilted my energy. That sun is so hot. Sunday was errand day.

During the week, I found out that Jonathon has extremely high blood sugar, borderline diabetic and if he doesn't get his eating habits, and therefore his weight, under control, he will be one very soon. My 12 year old son therefore, has a prescription to join weight watchers. The Dr. said it is the most sound plan out there and really teaches the right way to eat. Well, duh, I know this. I figure if my Jon can do this, there really is no excuse for me, right?

Well, except I have now started hiding what I eat. Ok, the oldest busted me the other night. Jon comes home tonight and I'm really going to jump on this with him. I can do anything if it's for my kids.

I've got nothing exciting going on this weekend other than dinner tonight with a friend and our kids. We'll need to pick someplace cheap because I've only got about $95 in my weekend budget and I need to get groceries with that. Fortunately, I only need about $40 worth of stuff so I should be ok.

I'll tell you, I've had to really stick to my budget.

I've also had some really great insight into what I want to do when I grow up and it involves taking a negative event and turning it into positive action on my part. More to come on that.

Dating wise, I have no prospects and have come to a place where I really don't want any. This in and of itself is shocking, but I really don't even go out and about anymore nor do I want to. Not even when I am out doing mundane things do I even think about meeting anyone. I'm at a really good place in my life and I don't want or need anything different.

It isn't all about me

I've come to the conclusion that the things I've gone through in my life aren't and don't necessarily have to be something that I need to learn for my life. Perhaps the things I 've learned and the experiences I've had are to ensure that my children are successful and relatively functional. I haven't always made the best decisions, shocking I know, when it comes to spending time or being maternal. BUT, I always want the best for them and I've come to realize that it's time the gauntlet gets passed.

I will not make the mistakes of my parents and I will play an active, integral role in my children's lives. If that's what my life is about then I'm ok with that. Would I like to have a relationship and someone to share my life with. Sure, but I'm thinking that perhaps that is not supposed to come to fruition until I'm done with the main purpose of my life and that's to get my kids to adulthood and have them be successful. It's gratification that I'm willing to delay.

I had a pastry for breakfast. I know, not the best choice, but it was there. And that with coffee went down smoothly. I'm off to the library sale and then to some used bookstores and consignment stores. Afterwards lunch with my princess and perhaps a stop at Walmart for some toiletries. I'll be sure to take pic's of lunch.

What are some good books you've read lately?

I think I might be addicted to books

The situation with my schooling has me in a very sad and depressed state this morning. I keep trying to look for positives in this. And I do have some options, they just aren’t what I wanted to do long term. I’ll go to Broward College on Monday to figure out my options, but I’m leaning towards completing the Legal Assistant program. It’s not law school, but it’s something.

It’s amazing to me how they can get away with something that is illegal and unethical. And me, the small man on the totem pole has to be David to their Goliath. I feel like Don Quixote at times. Wow, two literary analogies in one paragraph. I must work on that. Perhaps I’m looking at this the wrong way. This enables me to concentrate on what I really want to do and that is write.

My breakfast today was a replay of yesterday minus the eggs and spinach

Well, the good news is our VP of HR is willing to write a letter to Keiser along with my CFO stating that they did indeed prepay my classes. The Dr Evil Incarnate has said that he would be willing to re-consider his decision if they did this.

I had a great lunch. The company more so that the food. Went to Moe’s and I had the vegetarian quesadilla. I DI NOT EAT THE TORTILLA CHIPS!!!!! This was huge, because I started to mindlessly nibble on them as I was talking with my friend and caught myself after like two. Then we went to Border’s because I needed to get Mansfield Park for my Face-Book club. I got that and this:

I paid $20 for the whole lot of them, so how could I resist. Dr. K may have something to say about it, but still. It’s better than eating the tortilla chips. A couple of them are just books that look to be in the genre that I enjoy. One of them is a book about NASCAR and I’ve wanted to read it for quite some time now. The other, The Family Fortune has on the cover, “a radiant re-telling of Jane Austen’s Persuasion. How in the world could I resist that when it only cost me $3. Besides, I cleared out a shopping bag full of books from my shelves. So, I do have the room. I also resisted getting the Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. I have wanted to read that book for some time now and two people while I was paying was telling me HOW good that book is. Oy. Maybe my used book store will have it. They sell the books for ½ off the list price. If not, I’ll wait until Border’s gets a 40% coupon. Ooh, but I did just find it on Amazon for $8. Free shipping if I spend $25 or more. I shall deliberate over the weekend. Actually, I’ll see if I can find it for cheaper and if so, then I will get it, if not then sold to Amazon. Er, purchased from. Never mind the auctioneer metaphor doesn’t really fit here.

OMG!!! I just looked up the NI for my quesadilla. Thank fricken God I only ate of that. How the hell was that thing 600 calories. Are you fucking kidding me?????

*****PSA ALERT***** Look up the NI BEFORE you order and eat you r lunch.

I’ll be having celery and carrots sticks for dinner thank you very much to Moe the Bastard.

Right after I have this for a snack.

I couldn't resist. This was made by one of my coworkers who makes the best chocolate chip cookies in the world. So I had one.

volumetrics Rita-style

I’m going to make an effort to eat unprocessed foods. And in the spirit of this I have a completely different breakfast than yesterday. I had a bagel and coffee yesterday. I know that this doesn’t satisfy me, and yet, I’m still drawn to the yeasty chewy baked good. I add a little butter spritz and some sugar free orange marmalade. I enjoy it, but if I’m honest with myself, it totally doesn’t really satisfy me after I’ve finished it and it definitely doesn’t hold me until lunch time. That breakfast clocks in at 400 calories (including the creamer in my coffee).

My breakfast today as you can see is significantly higher in volume. It also clocks in and 400 calories. UNBELIEVABLE that the calorie counts are the same. Look at the significant amount of food I’m eating. AND it’s mostly unprocessed with the exception of the Ezekiel cereal which is a whole grain and relatively unprocessed cereal choice. Plus, I’m not using it as the crux of my meal but rather as a condiment. The spinach and eggs are a way to get in protein and a veggie for 80 calories. I may be out of control at night, but I’m going to do everything I can to be in control during the day. Speaking of control, I was satisfied after the eggs and yogurt, so the banana will be relegated to the snack pile if I would like one later. Now, I want to pay attention to when I get hungry again. This is a crucial observation and stepping stone for me. Next time I will ask myself, yea, this bagel is good, but do I want to be hungry again in an hour. The bagel isn’t bad, it just isn’t a great choice for me. There will be days and times where I choose it, but I’ll be armed with the knowledge that I’m going to get hungry again and can plan accordingly.

It’ll be a relatively quiet and slow day at work since the bosses are in back to back meetings literally all day. I don’t actually enjoy it when my day is slow as it tends to drag on and on. A slow and quiet day also amplifies the not-so-dulcet tones of my neighbor. Apparently, she missed the memo on how to use your inside voice in an office setting. Perhaps there is a seminar out there for this. For those of you who know me IRL, I know you are sitting there thinking, Hello Pot, kettle much?? But truly, at work, I’ve focused on speaking in a low tone as I don’t want the world to know my business. That’s what this blog is for.

I’m also midway through the summer and have yet to consistently wake at 5a and go for a walk. Hell, I’ve yet to consistently do anything other than clean, read and spend time with the kiddos. Not that those are bad things to be consistent on, I’ve just got to get moving in the morning. I did decide that I’m definitely going to listen to those two podcasts I talked about in the morning. Which means that my early morning exercise is either going to be a walk for an hour or a bike ride for an hour. Either are great choices. If I can just get myself out of bed and out the door.

Something else that came to me the other day, Ex BF did me a tremendous favor by breaking up. Honestly, I was, as I usually do, putting myself on the backburner for the sake of the relationship, not that anyone was asking me to, I just do this and I don’t want to be that person anymore. I got myself in motion and am awaiting notification if my transcripts situation is going to be cleared up. I should know by tomorrow. If so, then I’m going to be eligible to register for school in Aug. HUZZAH!!! I know I still have a long road, but so what. This time is going to pass anyway.

So, I’ve come up with a new game plan. Rather than constantly butting my head against the wall of not snacking at night while I’m watching tv, I’m going to try and live within my patterns and use them for positive gain. If I’m struggling and fighting eating at night, then let’s delay dinner until then. I’ll delay my snack at work until 430p. I never eat a big, heavy dinner so rather than eating immediately upon getting home, I’m going to settle in and exercise, ride bike etc. Spend time with the kids. And when I sit down to watch tv at 830-9p then I’ll eat dinner. I realize that many “experts” will be uber-critical of this strategy but I don’t really give a rat’s ass. This is my journey. If I can take what is and has been a negative behavior and somehow switch it so that it becomes positive (eating with my caloric limits) then that’s what I’ll do. I’ve never been conventional so why start now.

I’m really excited to try this out as I’ve been monitoring and analyzing my behavior patterns and actually using that to make improvements and find solutions feels very productive and positive to me.

Double Dipping a bad idea

For chips and dip

for bikini waxing

this was on the news today. They did a segment about the "dangers" of bikini waxing.

Tales from the scale. I'm up again. I took a picture of myself in my skivvies and am really determined to do this. It was mentioned to me yesterday that maybe I'm ok with myself at this weight. I think what's happened is that I'm ok with me. Whether I'm this weight or not. I'm ok with who I am. Finally, for the first time in 40 years. This doesn't make me happy about my weight though, this just means that I don't hate myself because of it.

It's Tuesday. Which means I get to start again. It's going to be a good week, I can feel it. I've got a low key day planned, work and I've planned out my meals for the day. I'll do the 30 Day Shred when I get home. Breakfast is cereal w/fruit. I seriously cannot wait until I finish this cereal. I know that it doesn't fill me up but I'm trying to spend as little as possible at the grocery store. I spent $77 this past weekend and it was mostly stuff for the kids, and Anthony for the week. Lunch is leftover Shrimp Feta over Brown Rice Stix. I love these things. They are like 50 calories per serving. And it's a significant serving too. Super easy to make and cook. I found them in the rice/grain aisle at Whole Foods. I'll take a picture next time as I'll be headed to Whole Foods this weekend.

Dinner is going to be rice and red beans congri. I'll have to figure out something to go along with it, but I have some veggie burgers that I can along with it on a thin. Ooh, I also have roasted corn and tomato salad which was really, really good. This was easy, diced a fresh tomato, roasted a couple of ears of corn on the grill. Mix together and spritz w/some balsamic vinaigrette.

I've also stayed true to my no book purchases until I've read 5. That 5 doesn't include the books that I've borrowed from April. However, I'm almost done with Steve Harvey's Act Like a Lady, Think like a Man so that brings me to 3. Two more and I can justify the books I bought the other weekend. It was a book purchase loan. LOL

I guess I should post the shrimp recipe but I've got to get ready for work. I'll do it tonight. Have a great day everyone.

You're Poking me? Seriously?

I haven't heard from Ex BF in a week. And then he pokes me on FB? Really. Now, I know you are probably wondering why I don't delete him from my friends list. I'm sure there's a multitude of reasons that Dr K will uncover over the next few sessions. I've thought about it, but I'm nosy. Although, I'm finding I care less and less.

And then the idiot sends me a poke.

Clueless. It isn't just for Alician Silverstone and blondes anymore.