I'm not sure this podcast helps

I've been listening to this podcast, Inside Out Weight Loss, and there are some positives that I get from it, but half the time I have to wade through 15 min or so to get the 10 min or just one thought that actually helps.

But, I haven't lost, I haven't done anything to lose. If anything, I've slowly gained some. And yet, every morning I listen to this thing. I guess there are some truths to be found and I do get a point from it. But then I go about my day and forget about it for the most part.

There have been many techniques and internal workings that I have worked on and yet, I must use the food as some sort of coping technique because I keep doing it. How long will I? I obviously know that this isn't going to do anything for me, if anything it's like playing Russian roulette. How long before the health starts to deteriorate? And instead of looking back at all the wasted time, I know I should look forward and embrace today, so I will. I was going to write about how difficult it is, but if I write it then I lend that thought validity. And I don't want to do that as I do believe that what we believe can play a part in our reality.

I really want to set a positive example for my children. They will do what I do, not what I say. I know this.

So, like a child, like a little baby learning how to walk, I stumble. I fall. But I will keep getting back up. Because, just like that baby, eventually, I will be able to take more than a couple of steps at a time. That is what this journey is.

Weekend!!

The week ended just fine. I had a decent day at work, and the she-devil wasn't too bad today. Have I told you about the she-devil? Well, she's going to be our new CFO and can definitely be demanding. To the extent of where I get in trouble for not having foresight for events and duties that aren't within my realm of responsibility. Yesterday was a good day. I didn't have to use my clairvoyant powers.

I went to bed really early last night. My Friday night date with Bill (Maher that is) will have to occur over the weekend I suppose. I know I'm not the only single gal who does this. I've embraced my reclusiveness as you know. But I was so tired, being the first week of school and all, I wound up falling asleep at like 930p or so while I was watching Lewis Black. He is one of my favorites.

My parents are on their way down and will be here this week. I'm going to get chores done around the house this morning before they get here so I can relax guilt free the rest of the weekend. I think my aunt and uncle are going to come down as well.

Food wise, I'm happy to announce that I didn't (because I went to bed) snack last night. I had to have an important conversation with my son, J. He's been doing great and is down 12 pounds. I'm very proud of him. Yesterday he bought his lunch at school, and I told him that he could. He also, as he told me later, bought a small ice cream. And then he proceeded to tell me that he felt "guilty" while he ate it and afterward. WHAT!! NO!! I screamed inside. The last thing in the world I want is for my children to endure the struggles internally with food that I have. My mission has to be for them to be normal. I've always focused on my daughter that I guess I never realized that it could happen to a boy as well.

I told J, that he shouldn't have felt guilty that he needed to realize that we need food to live. And that's it. There are no emotions involved. I asked what else he ate and he ate really healthy the next meal and prior to that meal. I explained that is the way it's normally done. Do not feel guilty, since you didn't do anything wrong.

He said he understood. I really hope so. It just makes me realize that the little eyes are watching me. Reinforces the fact that I need to model my behavior the way I want them to be, not just talk it. I need to walk it. Well, I suppose that is something I knew all along. I'll do this for them.

Sad Day

Sen Teddy Kennedy passed away. He was one of the first politician's that I took notice of as a child. My thoughts are jumbled and I don't have time to sort them out here as I have to get the kids ready for school. Needless to say, it'll be one of those days.

I'm sure I'll have more to say later, when I get settled.

The First Day of School

They were ready for the first day of school.

Of course, my son J, didn't want to take a picture, much less with his glasses so he took them off so I could snap this before we left for school this morning. They both enjoy school so it wasn't too big of a deal for them to have to go back. My eldest, always made a big deal about it. This was the first year that he didn't have to go. His adorable girlfriend did though and he had a picture similar to this one. Adorable.

In other random news, I've discovered that I am not the queen of run on sentences. Long sentences, yes, but run on sentences, no. This is due to my proper usage of punctuation. Contrary to what some people like to think, my grammar isn't all that horrible. Or perhaps it's just getting better. Either way.

I'm off to watch a little West Wing. My date with Josh Lyman awaits.

Sunday night

Ready to go to bed. The kids start school tomorrow. I was falling asleep earlier and now I'm here writing instead of hitting the sheets.

The kids are ready. I've got the lunch packed and they are all set with clothes and supplies. Shy wants to wear her hair straight, so I will get up a little early and let her do this.

My laundry is still on my bed. The folded stuff is put away, but I have to hang up clothes. I'm going to go and do that and then it the sack.

Books, books and what are you reading?

This is how I spent my day yesterday. Well, part yesterday and part on Friday. I went to a big library sale and I found a lot of books that I wanted. I think I need to put a moratorium on book buying until I at least read 5 books or so. The problem is that they are so cheap. $1 for the hardcovers and $.50 for the paperbacks.

I'm loving my book collection. Obviously, as you can see by the soccer ball, I have no shelves to put them on. I need to go to Ikea I think to get some shelves so I can get them off of the floor.

I'm currently reading The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo by Steig Larsson. I've heard so many good things about this book and it's gotten great reviews. I'll be sure to do a review if you are so interested.

I weighed in today and amazingly I lost a pound. I've been much more mindful this past week than I have in a long time and while I know I haven't been perfect so I'll accept the loss. I had a great day with my daughter yesterday. Took her to get her hair done as she starts school on Monday. We also went to the library and hung out there for awhile. We both enjoy it and it is a very cost effective way to spend time.

Breakfast this morning was really easy and yummy. Yes, I said yummy, deal with it.

Coffee in my most favorite coffee mug and my breakfast was fat free vanilla yogurt w/a drizzle of honey and some fresh strawberries and half a banana. I also topped it with half a larabar, pecan pie flavored. This clocks in at 300 calories and I was very satisfied with it. I feel so much better when I pay attention to my satisfaction levels so I'm not sure why I don't do it more often. Oh you know, like all the time, like normal people do.

My plans today include getting J's backpack for school. I also want to watch that Melissa chick, the winner of the Next Food TV Star, or whatever the title is.

Lunch is going to be a frittata that includes cleaning out my refrigerator. J lost another 2 pounds. He's down to 10 pounds in like a month or so. I am so proud of him. He's managed to do it without complaint. I suppose the threat of multiple needle sticks should he develop diabetes helped.

Also have been watching Studio 60. It lasted maybe one and a half seasons on tv. I call it smart tv which is why it went over Joe Q Public's head. Well, hopefully Aaron Sorkin will come up with a new show soon. He did this one as well as West Wing, possibly the best show ever. My favorite that's for sure.

I'm off to do laundry. Surely you don't come here for the exciting life I lead but rather, I'm sure the scintillating prose. LOL!!

My notes

Day 5 August 21, 2009

Limiting Beliefs can inhibit the way we live our life. Beliefs are something we believe in spite of the lack of conclusive evidence. Our belief in God for example. These are things we “can’t” do and they hold us back. They often have a self-fulfilling prophecy about themselves.

Change the belief to success because success begets success.

One limiting belief is that weight loss is hard. No, it doesn’t have to be. Maybe it has been that way but that doesn’t mean that we can’t change it to where it is easy. Eventually we think like naturally thin people and it will become that way. This doesn’t mean that we don’t have to work and invest the time but that doesn’t mean that it is difficult. There have been times where I’ve had to do work, not difficult work but work nonetheless. And we can make it fun. We are going to eat anyway, so why not make it fun and enjoy this journey.

Inner conflict is what makes it hard. The body is holdoing onto the weight for some reason. There is something inside of me that won’t let it go. Inner alignment can make it easy and fun. There is a positive aspect to every action. We do the things that we do in an attempt to enjoy ourselves and for pleasure. Eventually, all actions can be boiled down to trying to get something positive for ourselves. Substituting another non food behavior for this will find me releasing the weight. I’m sure of it.

Ask the following the question to determine WHAT your limiting beliefs are:

1. Is this goal desirable? Is it worthwhile?

Is this goal worth the effort that it will take to obtain it? Of course, sitting at my laptop it’s easy for me to say that it is. It’s when I’m about to make the wrong choice that I forget how much it means to me.

2. Is it possible for others?

Of course it is. I’ve seen many people lose and keep it off. They have made the necessary lifestyle choices to make the changes permanent.

3. Is it possible for me?

Of course it is. I’ve been at goal before. I’ve also been at a healthy weight and have exercised regularly. So I know I can do it. It’s just a matter of making it a routine yet again.

4. Is what it takes to achieve this goal appropriate and reasonable?

Will I do what it takes? Believe that this is too hard? No, it really isn’t. If I imagine that eating 1300 calories a day is enough (and it really is if I make the right choices) then I need to be happy. Believe it.

5. Do you deserve it? Well, this is the kicker isn’t it? If you don’t feel like you are worth anything then how can you justify allowing yourself to get healthy, or living a good lifestyle. The pressure to continue to be successful proves to be too much sometimes and then you fail. Self sabotage.

If you tell yourself that this is going to take forever, or that it will never happen, then this is what you believe. This is what you will have happen then.

Learned helplessness is also another limiting belief. Like the elephant tied with a chain. He doesn’t believe he can get free, and so he doesn’t. Just like me and stopping eating at night. I don’t believe that I can do that. That I have these habits that I always do and therefore can’t change, and therefore they don’t change.

Genetics are only about 20% the reason why we are overweight. I can control the other 80%.

I am 40 and this makes it harder to lose weight. I am ONLY 40. I have a lot of life to live and I don’t want to waste time with this struggle for the next 40 years. I need to be grateful for the struggle and learn and use the positive aspects of it. Enjoy the journey, but know that I can control some aspects of it. My eating at night and my fat rolls have been coping tools for me. Once I find other coping tools I can and will release the weight.

Three steps to changing limiting beliefs

Identify the belief (above questions)

Question the belief. As I did above as well. One thing to keep in mind is that I must be satisfied with what is while I reach for what can be.

I deserve a treat statement. Well, what’s that treat going to do for you? If it is going to keep you fat (yes, I say the fat word) then is it a treat?? Is it going to be in the terms of keeping you fat and therefore making it harder on your knees. That isn’t much of a treat.

Third step…change the belief. Identify the new belief. Visualize yourself in the new you. Being naturally thin is easier than carrying around those extra 25-30 pounds now isn’t it. Losing weight isn’t hard, being this weight is hard. State your intent and your new belief in the positive.

Try on the new you for size. Imagine you as you want to be. Eventually it will become your reality.

The importance of checking the NI

BEFORE YOU EAT YOUR MEAL!!!!!

I made what I thought was about a 450 calorie choice for lunch and it turned out to be a 663 calorie choice. Which means it's going to be a salad dinner for me. Ugh, actually no, it won't, I'll eat a regular dinner, but honestly, who knew a simple sandwich could be that many calories. Crystal...are you paying attention!!!!! That was WAY too many calories for a sandwich. Not that either one of us had an inkling of the high caloric value, but the gooey melty cheese that runneth over the sides should have been my first clue.

I'm not letting a little mistake, yes, that was a mistake, trip me up. I'm going to continue in my positive mindset and trudge on this path with a pep in my step because this is something that is forever. I will take this experience and learn from it. Uh, look up the NI moron. Yep, that's my lesson learned from today.

I also bought 'Tis by Frank McCourt, who recently passed away. You may be more familiar with his original memoir, Angela's Ashes, which was on the NY Times bestseller list for more than a year. I want to say it was closer to two years. In any event, I just listened to a replay of an interview he did on NPR back in '97 when the book was initially published. Hearing him speak in that Irish brogue of his made me want to read the other two books he wrote, 'Tis and Teacher man. I read Angela's Ashes back in '98 and was mesmerized by the poverty and the description of his childhood. This man overcame so much. I saw 'Tis at Borders for $4.99 so I bought that along with the MLA guide to Writing Research Papers. I figured that Jonathon could begin using this as he is sure to have to write some papers eventually this year. It will be good practice for him so that when he is required to use this style it will be second nature to him.

Came home to quiet. J is with his dad and Ant and Drea took her brother and Shy out to the pool. I'm going to get to cleaning while I have an empty apartment.

Day 4, Wednesday Aug 19

My plan for last night self destructed. I had a humongous chunk of cookies n cream ice cream cake that was leftover from Anthony’s birthday party. AND 2 cups of rice w/lentils for dinner. And a leftover pork chop. WTH?? I don’t eat meat, so I don’t know why I have been this week.

This morning on my drive into work, I was listening to a podcast, fat2fitradio.com, that I follow and they had a listener write in about how getting Type II diabetes impacted him. With details about the symptoms etc. Well, diabetes runs in my family, in a big way. And his early, early clues and indicators are things that sound familiar. So, Jesus, I realize, this isn't about fitting into my fucking pants or being the cutest thing in shoe leather. I totally do not want to have to deal with all of this bullshit. I've been really lucky with my health and I'm at normal levels with everything, but if I continue going the way I am going, I'm bound to develop this. Well, I'm having oatmeal for breakfast w/half a banana instead of my usual bagel. I’m satisfied with my breakfast, I realize after I eat it, that I don’t need a full banana.

If the 12 year old can do it, then so can I. Plus, last night, he says, "mommy, I'll help you if you want?" How cute is he?

1230p—In assessing my hunger, I realize I’m just getting hungry. Times to start getting the tuna drained (in water) and construct my salad. I think I need to buy some cute dishes to keep at work so that my pictures aren’t of Tupperware.1p Ate lunch until satisfied. ½ the can did just fine for me along with the salad. Lunch was chopped romaine, ½ can of albacore tuna, 10g of cranraisins, 10g of toasted, slivered almonds, 10 sprays of balsamic vinaigrette, ½ of a diced pink lady apple. I ate the other half as dessert. This suited me fine.

2p—Hunger assessment: not hungry at all. Drank 40 oz of water so far today. Treating myself to my first diet coke.

3:30p – thought I was getting hungry, but not really. May have half that banana left over at 4p

415p—ate my pineapple and banana. very yum and hit the spot quite nicely. Pineapple has more calories that I originally thought, but that’s not a problem. Since I’ve been tuning into my body and eating intuitively today. Well, I suppose I’m not TRULY eating intuitively since I’m counting the calories. But, you know what I mean. My tea however, was very watered down. Boo.

7p—WOO HOO!!! I did not have a snack at Nanny’s. I even picked up a tostone and I put it back. This is a huge victory for me.

715p—I had dinner and I ate too much, but I counted everything and I am still just under my calorie count. Which means, I am having a snack later, should I want one. Right now (841p) I don’t. I’m still full from dinner.

I have a date tonight with Dylan McDermott so I’ll see you guys later.

About to get really personal

My blog that is. I need the accountability that writing about my horrible eating habits will give me. I know I've come a long way, and I feel a lot better about myself. I'm not purging anymore which is a good thing. The bad thing is I'm still bingeing. BUT, I don't feel like it's true bingeing. Shit, who am I kidding. It is. Totally. Thus the weight gain.

But perhaps if I write about it honestly, I'll be less likely to do it. If I know I'm going to chronicle every detail, I'll stop and think about what I'm doing before I do it. It's human nature, isn't it?

In my session yesterday with Dr. K we did come to some conclusions and realizations about my night time eating. First, there is no structure once I leave work and walk into Nanny's house. It's a basic free for all. So, I definitely need to add some structure to that so that I can try and avoid that. Second, and this is so Freudian and cliche I'm embarrassed to write it, but apparently it does come down to childhood and your parents. At least in my case this is what it seems to be.

I've had to hide my eating from my parents in my childhood because I would get in trouble. They would actually yell at me for eating after dinner. I'm sure they had legitimate reasons, but what I got out of it was, you are a fatty and should not be eating. So I would have to do it in my room in hiding. Well, now, it's almost as if I'm doing it because I can. I'm the adult and can do what I want regardless of what other people's thoughts are. I know I have had this thought run through my mind with other things in my life, so it makes total sense that I would have it when it comes to this issue as well.

The other thing that had me thinking was that I'm no spring chicken. Keep staying overweight or losing and gaining the same 15 pounds and I'm going to eventually, and sooner rather than later, start having health issues. Well, that should be a more pressing reason for motivation to get my ass in gear. But you know what motivates me more. Not having a damn thing to wear. This is my motivation. Good or bad.

Last Chance Saloon by Mariane Keyes

I'm glad, glad, I'm not going out with you anymore. You made me completely bloody miserable the whole goddamn time. You're a total sadist and I've met a lovely man at work, and he thinksh I'm fantashtic and I jusht want you to know that you needn't worry about me because I'm fine. Just fine. Got that? Fine. F.I.N.N. Never been happier, actual---" Beeep, as she went over the message time.

Tuesday Teaser

I got this idea from another blog from Lori's Reading Corner and thought it was a good idea.

Here's the drill:

1. Grab your current read.

2. Let it fall open naturally to a random page.

3. Share a two teaser sentence from that page, anywhere between line 7 or line 12

4. List the name of the book your teaser came from so that people can get it to read if they so desire.

5. No Spoilers! Avoid them.

Keeping my fingers crossed

Well, Hurricane Season has begun. For those of you who don't live in Hurricane alley you don't and aren't thinking about it. But for those of us who do, yea, we try to avoid the thought of it. For those of us who experienced Hurricane Andrew all those years ago, we have no choice but to pay attention. Or those of my friends who live in the Carolina's, they too have to pay attention to the weather this time of year. (wow, that sentence is poorly constructed)

And as I'm watching Diane Sawyer, does she sound like she WANTS a big hurricane. Shit, I can't stand the media sometimes. Tag line underneath, "BREAKING NEWS, Hurricane Bill on the way" Uh, not yet it isn't. They don't know what it's going to do yet, it's too far out. Unfortunately and fortunately, these things can change in a matter of hours days. Let's hope that it stays out to sea.

Still not eating right. Not going to go into it much more than that, because there is nothing to tell. I.eat.like.shit. And I need to correct that.

Last but not least, today is my son's 18th birthday. I can't believe I'm the mom of an 18 year old. I have an adult child. Although, I have no misconception that he is going to magically begin acting like an adult and be responsible. Not at all.

Sunday Brunch

Why do we always have brunch on sunday? The collective we, not a specific we. It seems to me that people in general are more apt to have brunch on Sunday more so than any other day. Maybe because some of us go to church first thing, and then get out at a late breakfast/early lunch time? Or maybe because some of us like to lounge around reading the paper, drinking coffee and watching Charles Kuralt. Except that Google just told me that he died like ten years ago?? Wow, how did I miss that? They must play re-runs. Or am I thinking of some other middle aged balding journalist that is on on Sunday mornings?? Enough of that tangent.

My Saturday was relatively uneventful except for the constant torrid of rain. Although, I did get to go to the Produce Market in WPB by my aunt's house while Derek's iPod finished downloading. He graduates from some elite military training thing and we are all so proud of him. He is going to finish college and then go in as an Officer's Candidate. We (specific now) are all so proud of him. Anyway, this market is called Boy's Market. And they have a lot of great produce for mostly decent prices. Some things aren't always, but for the most part, it's definitely a great deal. I got a lot of veggies/fruit for this week, so be on the lookout for some food and meal pic's.

I'm constantly amazed by the number of elderly people who can fit within that square foot radius that they call Delray Beach.

Today I'm having brunch w/Nikki (my high school chum) on Las Olas. It's been awhile since we have gotten together so I'm looking forward to seeing her. I had not seen her respond text and I almost made plans to go to the South Beach Farmer's Market today. I wasn't sure what day I was going to do Derek's iPod so I had tentative plans for today as well. Thankfully, I got it all finished yesterday.

My eldest has a girlfriend. A very sweet girl.

So you are wondering where is the food in my blog???? I'll take pictures today. I'm going to re-start yet again today after getting on the scale and finding myself a full ten pounds up from what I was in March and a full 15 pounds more than I was when I ran the half marathon in February. I'm having coffee today and will have an egg white veggie omelet for brunch. I'll have a snack at around 3p of fruit, crackers w/hummus and then dinner tonight is going to be marinara and whole wheat pasta skillet dish. Side of broccoli and a salad.

TGIF BITCHEZ!!!!!

I'm very happy it's Friday. But that has more to do with the fact that it's payday more so than I now will have two days off. Although, that is a most definite plus.

This is going to be the shortest post in my blog history because I'm already running late and need to get ready for work. I've got absolutely nothing to do at work as all four of the people that I provide support for are out of the office. Oh, I'll have several phone calls and random clerical shit to do I'm sure, but for the most part I intend on reading and planning my menu for the week as well as what I'll be doing over the weekend.

Mad Men premiere's on Sunday. I've yet to watch the second season so I will be setting the DVR to watch that at a later date. Hopefully I can get Season 2 viewed before the second episode of Season 3. I'm also currently reading three books. Still reading Neuromancer, Last Chance Saloon, and The Portable Writer's Conference. All three totally different. I hope to finish them this weekend as well.

I might take pictures of food today. I'm totally winging it as I don't have a plan. Oh shit, and I have to find my camera.

Two more people died this week in the news. Eunice Kennedy Shriver and Les Paul. I' thinking that 2009 is the year of Death.

Something Fun and Random

I subscribe to a lot of blogs. A lot of them have to do with books and reading. This one, had an idea of the Random Reading Challenge or something like that. Anyway, you position yourself in a section of the library (or bookstore if you have $$ to spend) and have random directions for yourself, like 3rd row, 2nd shelf, 28th book from the left and then you pick that book and read it. Then write a review.

When I go to the library this weekend this is what I am going to do. Sounds like fun. Since my library has all it's fiction together who knows what I'm liable to get.

In other book related news, I really need a bookshelf.

Pseudonyms

I'm going to get all Andy Rooney on you now. Do you wonder why people write under psudonyms and then use their real number with it? I imagine, or hope, that it was because they were originally published under the pseudonym and then became famous with their real name and the original works were re-released with both names attached.

I started thinking about this when I saw a Nora Roberts book, being written under the name of JD Robb. It's a series and not a romantic one, so I assumed that she wanted to, well, she didn't want, um, yea, I can't quite figure it out. So the only thing I'm coming up with is she wrote those first and then the romantic stuff. However, I think I'm wrong about that.

I'm also sure this has been answered in some interview somewhere on the web. I'm just too lazy to google it.

I wanted to stay up tonight and have a Mad Men marathon since the third season starts next week but I'm getting quite drowsy. I'm sure once I pick up my book, I'll be out within minutes. Not that the book I'm reading isn't good, it really is. I just always fall asleep when I'm reading in bed. I suppose I'll have to DVR the first episode since I am relatively sure I won't be finished with Season 2 by then.

In other unrelated matters, I had to turn in the BMW back to my boss. My car is fixed and his family comes back tonight, so he needed the extra car back. *sigh* One of these days I'll have a luxury gas guzzler and I"ll have so much money I won't care how much I'm paying in gas or what it is doing to the environment. I figure if I'm rich enough to not give a shit about that then I'll definitely be philanthropic in other areas! Like only shopping at Whole Foods.

Ah, nothing even good on tv to fall asleep to. Off to read about London yuppies who drink too much and work too hard. Gotta love a good chick lit book.

Back to work

After being off for a week and pretty much doing nothing but shopping with my mom, it's back to work for me. Blah.

I suppose I should be thankful to have a job to go to, and I am. I particularly like my job and the people I work with, so I should be doubly thankful. And I am. I still would rather not work. Or at least not be tied to having to work. But then I suppose, who wouldn't??

The bright side of having to go into work is the uninterrupted reading time at lunch. Always looking to find a positive point to everything.

What am I eating today?? I've not been following any program. Or even eating intuitively. Mondays are notorious for starting over and far be it from me to try and buck that trend. I'll be counting points again my friends. In an attempt to stop the cycle. If I just cut out the snacking I'm relatively certain that I would drop at least 5 pounds. Let's go with that.

Again.

And again.

Until I get it right.

Finally finished Mansfield Park. Boy, that Aunt Norris is a piece of work. I would have told her off about a million times and most of Jane Austen's heroines would have as well. But Fanny was definitely a meeker and subdued character than her normal ones. It did wrap up rather quickly which was slightly surprising to me, but I enjoyed the book nonetheless. It was more difficult to get into than her other books.

Now, I'm reading Neuromancer by William Gibson, which is a sci-fi classic from the 80's along with The Last Chance Saloon by Marian Keyes which is a chick lit book from England (or Ireland as the case may be). Both are really good if not totally different. I pick each one up depending on my mood. I'll bring Neuromancer to work with me today. I'm further along in that one than I am the other.

I did go book shopping again this weekend. I can't help it. I have so many books now, but when I see them so cheap, I have to pick them up, especially if the title's are on my TBR list.

Ugh, time to get ready for work. Maybe I'll post pictures of my food later. If it's blogworthy that is.

Best Laugh I've had all week

I've been off this week. Hanging out with my mom who is down from Tally and shopping and getting the kids ready for school. There are still three weeks before it starts, ok, almost two now, but it's better to have it all done and be ready for it, don't you think.

Anyway, I'm at my grandmother's this afternoon and she tells me about the ham she made yesterday. She often forgets I don't eat meat, so she is asking me if I think it's good. She made it yesterday. I say well, of course, and then she proceeds to tell me how she didn't realize that it had two plastic coverings and the second one was air compressed on the ham. Nanny, I say, did you cook it with the plastic wrap on it. Yes, she says, it was wrapped so tight I thought it was the skin. My mother then chimes in with the, I was wondering why it wouldn't absorb the basting sauce. WTF?? Really?? Did it taste good? I ask. Well, my mother says, it was a little dry.

LMFAO!!!! My aunt and I just cracked up laughing. LOFL!! Gotta love Nanny.

Writing on the rise

I just read a blog, BookNinja, that spoke of creative writing programs being offered on the rise. And one person commented that of course, with all the people blogging it shouldn't be a surprise that so many people are interested in writing and expressing their thoughts in written form.

But is it? I mean, do all those people taking creative writing courses really want to be published or it is another means to an end. I mean, there are about a million jobs in which expressively yourself in a written format is important. Look at the advent of email. So many people use email as an informal means of communication rather than picking up the phone. Therefore, making your writing skills more important. Or not, as the case may be with some people that I work with.

Then of course, there are all the people who blog and write that DON'T take a writing course for any number of reasons. They just seem to read a lot.

This just in, the ex bf is no longer on my friends list on FB.

Answering machines should be mandatory for businesses

So, I went to run errands, er, check out a used book store on the east side of town. One of only two in the county. I tried calling beforehand but got no answer. No, this wasn't a repeat of where I showed up at the address only to find that the economy had taken it as a prisoner of war. Rather, this particular indie shop is closed on Sundays. Isn't it a requirement for a business license to have an answering machine at a minimum to indicate what your hours are. Apparently in North East Ft. Lauderdale this is not the case.

Not wanting my trek eastward to have been in vain I took US1 to the two story and rather large B&N to check it out. I don't have a two story one close to me and I wonder if it's the same size or is it just my imagination because it's two stories. Either way, it was a pleasant way to spend a couple of hours. My daughter loves books, so of course after getting my mandatory Skinny latte from the SB counter I went upstairs to the children's section. Once Shy had her pick, I went down to peruse the bargain sections. I found this...

in hardcover no less, for a whopping $6.98

I bought it as I've heard nothing but good things about this book. AND my library has it classified under the YA section so I'm wondering if my 12 y/o would like to read it when I do and we can discuss. Either way, a bargain I couldn't resist. It did mean, though that I would have to yet again delay my purchase of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, a book that I've been dying to read. Regardless of the stacks and stacks I have at home, once I get this book, I'm dropping everything.

Now, back to Japan and Neuromancer.

Oatmeal is the new garbage dump

This has to be said. I've noticed a trend lately. I can remember the days of when you would add in a banana and a handful of walnuts into your oatmeal and call it a day. Or some raisins. Or an apple and some apple spice. Lately, however it seems that it is common and trendy to add in at least 5 different add ins to your oats and eat it that way.

Maybe it's because people don't like the taste of the oats and are trying to find ways to defeat the purpose. I don't know, call me crazy but adding in the caloric equivalent of toppings to your oatmeal seems counterproductive to me. I mean, when I want to eat oatmeal I want the oatmeal. The other things are nice as embellishments but when they become equal to the amount of oatmeal then can you really call it oatmeal. I suppose it can be compared to coffee where is it really coffee anymore if your adding in way more stuff than the coffee itself.

And what the fuck is the deal with chia seeds???????? Who eats that?

In other random yet related news, green monster drinks. I must have missed the CNN newsflash where grinding up your vegetables and mixing them with milk is the way to go now.

I long for the simple days.

Lazy Sunday Morning

Catching up on reading my blogs. The dog, not the kid, woke me this morning. Geez, well I suppose it's better than her having an accident. I totally need to give her a bath today. Folding laundry and doing that are the only chore related items on my agenda today.

I've become torn between the two books I'm reading. I'm about half way through Mansfield Park and the uncle has just returned from a year long, actually plural years, to Antigua. He appears to be the only one in the entire lot, with the exception of Edmund, that treats Fanny as if she is truly family rather than a glorified servant. It's been pissing me off that she is so mild and meek, but I suppose that is what Austen is going for.

Neuromancer I just started last night and it's not been particularly easy to read. Gibson has some made up words that I've never heard so I've been using my 4th grade "context clues" skills to determine what it is he is trying to convey. Of course, he did invent the word "cyberspace" so you would have thought that some of these others would have taken off as well. No, they really didn't. The story is, however, interesting and since I actually have a deadline with an event scheduled, Aug 19th, I suppose that I will go ahead and try to finish this book first. I'll be sure to let you know how I like it since it's my first adult foray into science fiction.

I haven't eaten anything yet today, but I did weigh in as I want to go ahead and start actually following Weight Watchers. Again. I've been maintaining the weight I am now for quite some time and have determined that if my 12 y/o can manage to stay on plan then WTF am I waiting for. Seriously. I am just enjoying coffee right now. Breakfast will be a bowl of cereal. I'm keeping to my budget by not buying items until I'm completely out of them. Which means no breakfast food until I run out of the cereal, oatmeal and eggs that I have. I'm a relatively boring breakfast eater. Pictures to follow.

I won't be doing much today but going to the grocery store and hanging out at home. By choice. Oh, I may take the little one to the pool or the park.

Books, books, and more books

I joined a book club via meetup.com which seems like it isn't your typical book club. In an attempt to get out more I decided that I wanted to do so in a way that was stimulating intellectually and since I love to read why not?

Anyway, the book I'm supposed to be reading is a science fiction book of all things. Not exactly my cup of tea, and I'm not going to lie, I like to read fluff every once and awhile. But, so far this book seems very interesting. It's Neuromancer by William Gibson. It was published in 1984 and is a futuristic look at something, I'm not sure what.

But I love the opening sequence where the main character walks into a bar and the bartender is the ugliest human alive or something to that effect. Hah!! I have been switching back and forth between this and Mansfield Park. Two totally and completely different books. From 19th century England to 22nd century or so Japan. Hmm. It's going to be an interesting Saturday night that's for sure.

I'm also going to find a way to squeeze in an episode or two of Mad Men.

Another weekend

It's another wonderful weekend. Wonderful because I get to spend two days doing exactly what I want. Well, with the exception of chores. But other than those, I'm doing fun things with the kiddos.

Last night was movie night and we watched "Marley & Me." I really enjoyed that movie. I've become a dog person owning my little Sedona so of course I cried at the end. But we really did enjoy it.

Sat is chore day. Well morning anyway because todays chores are just dusting and laundry. I break out the chores day to day so that I never have to spend more than an hour or two doing chores. Laundry doesn't count. I can read/watch tv between loads.

I think we'll go to the pool if the weather holds out and the library of course.

My car was towed to my mechanic yesterday since the AC went out in it. I'm hoping that it isn't too much $$. In the meantime, my wonderful boss has let me borrow one of his cars. The BMW SUV. How fun to drive. The kids particularly like the dvd player in it.

Someone said to me on FB yesterday, how come I've been so quiet and I realized that being quite online means perhaps that you are living life offline. Which in this circumstance is a good thing. I've discovered I have reclusive tendencies and I'm totally ok with that. As I age I'm enjoying time alone more and more.

Off to dust those bunnies.